I am rad. I was born in a house I built with my own hands. I can see through walls, and fly around the world in order to turn back time. I can travel across the stars on wings made from my own wishes. I have eaten babies slow roasted over an open fire. I have Rockstar for blood, and Vampires fear me. I taught Prince how to wear assless chaps. I discovered Stephen King; I found him at a state fair, he was on display for his superb hair.
I invented the flying car, and taught fish how to swim. My tears can heal the sick, and tell the future. Chuck Norris bows to me. EVERY barista knows my order. I power the servers for Netflix Watch Instant service by sheer will. Thomas Andrews modeled the Titanic off my childhood drawings, but my designs were too advanced and he got it all wrong.
I know The Doctor's name.